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Queen of Swords
August 26, 2003, 02:21 PM
Today a group of Catholics came to my parents' house to pray for them. My parents aren't Catholics and my father disagrees with practically everything they say, but he said nothing because he thinks that anyone devout and kind-hearted enough to come to his house and pray for him deserves a hearing. I heard my mum looking for a clean white cloth - which the Catholics had apparently asked her for - but I was busy writing and didn't pay any attention to what was happening in the living-room.

After the Catholics left, I went to the living-room to take away the empty water glasses. I walked inside and stopped dead. A white towel had been spread over the top of the stereo. Standing on it, in the place of my parents' photograph, was a two-foot-tall framed picture of a long-haired Jesus, holding up his hands as though he was going to squeal, "Girlfriend!" and smack someone playfully. On either side of him were smaller pictures of Mary and some saint I didn't recognize; directly before the picture was a six-inch-tall crucifix and a bowl full of lighted candles. There was also another, taller candle in my saucer (!) and two rosaries, one dark red and one dark blue.

I stared at the entire set-up for a long moment and then said, "Dad, you're not going to leave this here, are you?"

My dad, who had been saying just the other day that he didn't like all this Catholic kowtowing to graven images, muttered that the Catholics had erected the thing out of the goodness of their hearts. "Besides, they'll be back in two weeks to take it away."

"Oh, good," I said. "I just hope the pastor of your church doesn't drop in before then. You know, if we put a few flowers there and maybe a lingam, it'll look like a Hindu shrine."

"What's a lingam?" my mother wanted to know, although she didn't like my answer very much. Anyway, I had no idea that part of Catholicism involved the construction of elaborate shrines for people who might not even be Catholics. Will the prayers not work if one aspect of the set-up is missing, like the white towel? How long do the candles have to burn? (My dad blew them out immediately, so I said, "Happy birthday!") And most of all, what's the difference between this and so-called pagan rites?

Oh well, two weeks more and Jesus, along with his painted entourage, will have moved on to blesserize someone else's home.

GunnerJ
August 26, 2003, 02:30 PM
Wow. Catholicism in the UAE is a lot more fun than in America.

Maybe if my church had me go around to play "Junior Shrinebuilder" in other peoples' houses, I would still go.

Heathen Dawn
August 26, 2003, 02:33 PM
This reminds me of:

http://www.bluecorncomics.com/pics/pagan.jpg

Mageth
August 26, 2003, 04:39 PM
Who was it that just the other day on another thread was claiming that Catholics don't proselytize?

Stiletto One
August 26, 2003, 08:31 PM
Originally posted by Mageth
Who was it that just the other day on another thread was claiming that Catholics don't proselytize? Wasn't that Ed?

chanoc
August 28, 2003, 09:22 PM
I would urinate on the shrine. ;)

Roland98
August 29, 2003, 10:46 AM
Wow. My dad has a whole room that he's made into a shrine, but he's never tried to do anything in my house.

Sounds a bit like the Malcolm in the Middle episode that was on this past Sunday; they got assistance from a church to build a nursery, and they painted a huge Jesus mural above the crib. No candles, though. ;)

Trecker
August 29, 2003, 06:35 PM
Originally posted by QueenofSwords
Today a group of Catholics came to my parents' house to pray for them. ...................... Anyway, I had no idea that part of Catholicism involved the construction of elaborate shrines for people who might not even be Catholics. Will the prayers not work if one aspect of the set-up is missing, like the white towel? How long do the candles have to burn? (My dad blew them out immediately, so I said, "Happy birthday!") And most of all, what's the difference between this and so-called pagan rites?

Oh well, two weeks more and Jesus, along with his painted entourage, will have moved on to blesserize someone else's home.

Queen, you are funny!:D This is like no Catholics who I have ever known. They are probably Pentecostalists - Catholics, from the Russian Orthadox school, needing to satisfy their missionary requirement, but being afraid of 3rd world countries. My own Catholic father was once given the opportunity to have 7th Day Adventists pray for him when it became public knowlege that he was diagnosed with M.S. The only hitch was that the Adventists wanted to get paid for their services of intercession. (no shame at all!) I really like the "white towel" gimmick. Sounds like a simple sales technique to enlist the initial participation (submission) of victims in a non-threatening manner. I think it would be interesting to change the color of the towel.

I believe I would also be tempted to construct a few more shrines in the same room for the return of your father's newfound Catholic "friends". I, personally, am very fond of "bathtub shrines" with statues of the Blessed Virgin and the Bleeding Heart. You could call your place something like,"The Grotto" and get placed on a Sacred Novena Tour. Then again, all may be over in two weeks and nothing left to talk about.